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55 Inch Screen
 
I’m 51 and brand new
and old as fuck;
it’s my own new apartment
and I’ll do whatever I want.
I’ll buy this huge TV
so I can watch
terrifying monsters
and technicolor heroes
grind each other down
in a rote old dance
made bright
by the expansive
digital realness
of this internet-ready splurge.
I’ll watch it for a week
as if it might run out,
and I’ll eat candy
and smoke dope
and take off my bra.
But then in the following week
I’ll grow up all over again,
and the heroes will be
too young to be interesting
and the monsters will be
pathetic compared to divorce
and cancer and madness,
and then the stupid big thing
will sit and wait for me
while I make bigger,
more interesting mistakes, and
fight other bloodier battles.

Sara Eddy is a writing instructor at Smith College, in Northampton, Massachusetts. Some of her poems have appeared recently in Zingara, Tishman Review, and Heartwood, and are forthcoming in Raw Art Review. She lives in Amherst, Massachusetts with a teenager and a black cat and three beehives.  She can be found on Instagram at @beequeen66.
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